In January 2020 I set an intention to be more and do less. Boy, the joke was on me. The universe (and COVID) had other plans for me and the rest of the world. Instead of learning to be, I went into full-fledged survival mode for almost two years, starting with scrounging stores for toilet paper, washing my groceries, and learning new vocabulary like shelter-in-place and N95. Toward the end of 2021, I decided I wanted a do over and declared 2022 The Year of Being vs. Doing.
To kick it off my self-care journey, I booked a 10-day trip away from my husband, kiddos and the countless schedules and routines that keep my calendar booked and our lives functioning. Alas, my trip was postponed due to COVID (hardly shocking, I know), but almost two months, countless hours of preparation, and a few headaches later, I finally departed in a giant, metal Southwest tube for my rescheduled getaway. I spent four days connecting with my BFF at Miraval Austin Resort & Spa, followed by six unforgettable days in Costa Rica for a meditation/get your Zen women’s retreat for the Young Presidents’ Organization.
I had never been away from my family for that long. In the days leading up to my departure, my husband asked if I was excited for my trip. My honest answer was NO!!!!! I had so much shit to delegate and get done before I left that I couldn’t allow myself the luxury of excitement. I was also a little worried something would go wrong. COVID tends to disrupt and derail things after all, especially travel plans. Gratefully, my trip went off without a hitch and I learned a great deal during my sabbatical.
What I Learned During My 10-Day Self-Care Journey:
Make personal development a priority
There is a good reason flight attendants tell people traveling with small children to put their oxygen masks on first. To be of service to ourselves and others, we must make time for our personal development and guard it fiercely,
Honor the roles/chapters of our lives
Let’s be honest. All time is not created equal. There are times in our lives when we will have more bandwidth to focus on our personal development and there will be times when we have less. They can both be great and fulfilling, as long as personal development is not pushed out entirely.
Embrace the mess
It’s not about living a perfectly Zen life all the time. It’s about learning to find the calm in the middle of the storm (because there will always be storms!)
Get off the ride
When you find yourself on the endless doing loop (you know, the one where your head feels like it will explode because you have so much to do), take a moment to get off the ride. Ask yourself, Where am I right now? Take deep breaths and bring yourself to the present moment. Even stopping for just two minutes can work wonders to calm your mind and body.
Put the old tools away
Marshall Goldsmith wrote a book called What got you here won’t get you there and the title really speaks to me. I’ve realized that all the skills, habits, and traits that helped me be a successful entrepreneur are the ones that prevent me from relaxing and taking care of my mental, emotional, and spiritual health. To move forward into my next chapter and get closer to the self-actualization I seek, I am determined to keep those skills, habits, and traits that have served me and my career well but at the same time, I must let them sit second seat to the new, softer ones I am purposefully developing. Therefore, I will put my old skills, habits, and traits in my toolbox for safekeeping so I can grab them and utilize them when they’re needed.
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