Let’s be honest. This year has been a hot mess. A shit show. A dumpster fire. You get the picture. All the 2020 memes have been well-deserved and sometimes hysterical – if you’re into dark humor. Finding the elusive “silver lining” through the darkness of a global pandemic, schools, businesses, and entire countries shutting down, civil unrest, riots, looting, election craziness, and empty grocery store shelves was very difficult at times. In fact, some days I found myself at a complete loss to find anything that sparked joy in my life. It wasn’t all 2020’s fault, of course.
I’ve always had a complicated relationship with happiness but we seem to have come to an understanding – if I accomplish a difficult goal, I’m rewarded with feeling a happiness “high.” I’m a high achiever by nature so I’m perpetually trying to slay my goals, then I immediately look for the next thing to kick ass at that will bring me a renewed sense of accomplishment and happiness. I get trapped in the endless loop of… IF I conquer that goal, THEN I will be happy. There are two problems with my strategy. 1. It doesn’t work because happiness in itself is a fleeting emotion, not a permanent state of being. 2. The loop never ends.
The good news for me and others like me who strive for happiness and struggle to find contentment in their present achievements, is the founding father of positive psychology, Martin Seligman, discovered there are purposeful actions we can take to cultivate our own happiness. How cool is that? The key is consistently taking the recommended actions and making them daily habits. I’m going to repeat myself because this is really important. You CAN cultivate your own happiness but it only lasts if you are consistent with it.
One act Martin Seligman recommends to invite more happiness into your life is to embrace an attitude of gratitude. Here are a few more ideas to get you started on your own quest to cultivate more happiness:
- Every morning write down three things you’re grateful for in your journal. Yes, coffee counts.
- Whenever the feeling strikes, grab a Post-it Note and write down what you’re feeling grateful for. Post it somewhere you’ll see it often to remind yourself of the great things in your life.
- Go old school and buy some Thank You cards. Write down your appreciative thoughts and snail mail them to people whom you’re grateful to have in your life.
- When you catch yourself saying you, “Have to…,” rephrase it with, “I get to…” You don’t “have to” do the laundry. You “get to” do the laundry because you have clothes, running water, electricity, and a washer and dryer that work, and you’re grateful for them.
- Check out my latest newsletter (yes, this is shameless self-promotion) for more great ideas on how to cultivate more happiness in your life through gratitude.
